|recent posts|
A Quote of Love
“If you want to be loved, be loving.”Dr. Norris Chumley
The Spirit of the Islands
Hawaii is one of my favorite places on earth and the Big Island of Hawaii holds a special kind of magic for me. With worries the last couple days of Tsunami warnings my thoughts have been on Hawaii’s islands and my friends who live there. So this post is for each of you; may the islands remain safe and the spirit of Aloha surround each of you.
kinsiekins photo flickr
Quote of the Week
I’ve always been in the right place at the right time. Of course I steered myself there.Bob Hope
Breaking Free
My Friday quote comes from Eckhart Tolle’s A New Earth, pg 161.
The beginning of freedom from the pain-body lies first of all in the realization that you have a pain body. Then, more important, in your ability to stay present enough, alert enough, to notice the pain-body in yourself as a heavy influx of negative emotion when it becomes active.
This is such an amazing book, well worth the read.
How Do We Move Beyond Pain That Feels Greater Than We Can Bear?
Dad and I before I was three years old.
As I watched My Sister’s Keeper I was touched by the raw pain of Kate’s own struggle to make sense of the changes her family faced through her illness and the devestation of her loss as they watched her die. At one point in the movie Kate’s sister asked the judge how it felt when her daughter died. I could answer immediately, having faced the loss of my daughter and my parents as well as others near and dear to me in the last decade.
For me their loss feels like life has ended. It feels like all the blood has drained from my heart; I’m standing, breathing, yet feel empty and dead. It feels like my life is over.
I was touched by the honesty of what this family faced and how they each handled it so differently, yet in the end when Kate passed they found a way to honor her memory with a yearly family vacation to a place she loved; the wide open spaces of Montana. For each of us how we bear our grief and find our way through our pain differs. Yet honestly no matter who we are, what we do for a living or where we live we each feel the depth of our losses deep in our soul. No matter if we reach out or go within we must take steps, baby steps forward toward our healing.
Yes, our life as we knew it is over; the life we desired blown to bits and we’re left to take one tiny step at a time into a future we really don’t understand or care for. Our loss is deep and lasting. With time and effort our healing will begin. I heard Nate Burkus say on Oprah recently that after his partners death he didn’t want to do much of anything for four months, that he was living but felt dead. He often thought, “what’s the point of it all.” He would often stay in bed grieving.
It’s true, in the depth of our loss many of us have those times , I certainly had them. I had days when dying felt easier than living, when my mother’s loss felt like the end of my life. How do we move beyond the loss that devestates us? We take small steps. We find support whether it be a therapist, our family or friends or a healthy combination of all three. Maybe we talk to a minister or we take comfort in silent prayer. The important thing is to take a step. Each small step will lead to a bigger step when we’re ready, until we reach a place where we can take a breath again without feeling pain.
With many small steps we will reach a day when we wake up and feel a smile cross our face; when for so long there was nothing to smile about. There is no magic that will heal us. Somehow, with time after living in our pain we realize we can honor the memory and love of the one’s we’ve lost better by living joyfully. As many, myself included can attest, when a loved one is dying they usually express their desire for us to live fully. They want our happiness. They don’t want us living daily in pain or living empty lives, wishing for them. For me the best way to honor my loved ones is to touch other lives and show people through my example that there’s a way through the pain and loss.
My life looks different than I expected. I’m actually laughing as I write that statement. It’s as if a bulldozer destroyed my life and one block at a time, through a sea of tears I began to rebuild it. Did I want this life? Not so much really, but clearly God did. I now focus my life on writing, maintaining a website that supports and inspires others in grief or loss and I treasure those I love deeply. I’ve learned life is short, pain is very real and we are best served living life with as much joy as our hearts can hold. It happens one step at a time. Take that first step with me.
|caring for your spirit|
A Quote of Love
“If you want to be loved, be loving.”Dr. Norris Chumley
The Spirit of the Islands
Hawaii is one of my favorite places on earth and the Big Island of Hawaii holds a special kind of magic for me. With worries the last couple days of Tsunami warnings my thoughts have been on Hawaii’s islands and my friends who live there. So this post is for each of you; may the islands remain safe and the spirit of Aloha surround each of you.
kinsiekins photo flickr
Quote of the Week
I’ve always been in the right place at the right time. Of course I steered myself there.Bob Hope
Breaking Free
My Friday quote comes from Eckhart Tolle’s A New Earth, pg 161.
The beginning of freedom from the pain-body lies first of all in the realization that you have a pain body. Then, more important, in your ability to stay present enough, alert enough, to notice the pain-body in yourself as a heavy influx of negative emotion when it becomes active.
This is such an amazing book, well worth the read.
|caring for yourself|
“If you want to be loved, be loving.”Dr. Norris Chumley
Hawaii is one of my favorite places on earth and the Big Island of Hawaii holds a special kind of magic for me. With worries the last couple days of Tsunami warnings my thoughts have been on Hawaii’s islands and my friends who live there. So this post is for each of you; may the islands remain safe and the spirit of Aloha surround each of you.
kinsiekins photo flickr
My Friday quote comes from Eckhart Tolle’s A New Earth, pg 161.
The beginning of freedom from the pain-body lies first of all in the realization that you have a pain body. Then, more important, in your ability to stay present enough, alert enough, to notice the pain-body in yourself as a heavy influx of negative emotion when it becomes active.
This is such an amazing book, well worth the read.
Dad and I before I was three years old.
As I watched My Sister’s Keeper I was touched by the raw pain of Kate’s own struggle to make sense of the changes her family faced through her illness and the devestation of her loss as they watched her die. At one point in the movie Kate’s sister asked the judge how it felt when her daughter died. I could answer immediately, having faced the loss of my daughter and my parents as well as others near and dear to me in the last decade.
For me their loss feels like life has ended. It feels like all the blood has drained from my heart; I’m standing, breathing, yet feel empty and dead. It feels like my life is over.
I was touched by the honesty of what this family faced and how they each handled it so differently, yet in the end when Kate passed they found a way to honor her memory with a yearly family vacation to a place she loved; the wide open spaces of Montana. For each of us how we bear our grief and find our way through our pain differs. Yet honestly no matter who we are, what we do for a living or where we live we each feel the depth of our losses deep in our soul. No matter if we reach out or go within we must take steps, baby steps forward toward our healing.
Yes, our life as we knew it is over; the life we desired blown to bits and we’re left to take one tiny step at a time into a future we really don’t understand or care for. Our loss is deep and lasting. With time and effort our healing will begin. I heard Nate Burkus say on Oprah recently that after his partners death he didn’t want to do much of anything for four months, that he was living but felt dead. He often thought, “what’s the point of it all.” He would often stay in bed grieving.
It’s true, in the depth of our loss many of us have those times , I certainly had them. I had days when dying felt easier than living, when my mother’s loss felt like the end of my life. How do we move beyond the loss that devestates us? We take small steps. We find support whether it be a therapist, our family or friends or a healthy combination of all three. Maybe we talk to a minister or we take comfort in silent prayer. The important thing is to take a step. Each small step will lead to a bigger step when we’re ready, until we reach a place where we can take a breath again without feeling pain.
With many small steps we will reach a day when we wake up and feel a smile cross our face; when for so long there was nothing to smile about. There is no magic that will heal us. Somehow, with time after living in our pain we realize we can honor the memory and love of the one’s we’ve lost better by living joyfully. As many, myself included can attest, when a loved one is dying they usually express their desire for us to live fully. They want our happiness. They don’t want us living daily in pain or living empty lives, wishing for them. For me the best way to honor my loved ones is to touch other lives and show people through my example that there’s a way through the pain and loss.
My life looks different than I expected. I’m actually laughing as I write that statement. It’s as if a bulldozer destroyed my life and one block at a time, through a sea of tears I began to rebuild it. Did I want this life? Not so much really, but clearly God did. I now focus my life on writing, maintaining a website that supports and inspires others in grief or loss and I treasure those I love deeply. I’ve learned life is short, pain is very real and we are best served living life with as much joy as our hearts can hold. It happens one step at a time. Take that first step with me.
|healing|
Our Perception of Security
Photo By Fiancailles Flickr
Security is a perception. We are never completely safe, our situations just seem safe. We bask in the contentment of seeming safety. It’s only when disaster strikes, jobs are lost, finances are compromised or our health is jeapordized that we realize what felt safe was simply a perception. Our real security comes from within, in feeling and trusting the spirit of God in our life. It’s God’s prescence in our life that brings a true sense of feeling secure.
It doesn’t mean we wont lose our job or suffer loss, we very well may, just as I did. My belief and trust in God didn’t keep my parents from dying of cancer. What it did do is give me the strength to survive, to move through the worst pain I’d ever experienced in my life. There were hours and days when my life seemed too painful to go on. The pain of my mother’s loss was debilitating, devestating and I couldn’t even pick up the pieces. Death felt in those moments preferable to the intense pain of grief and loss I was feeling.
Losing our sense of security in the world, a job for many, my mother for me, often feels like the end of the world; and it is the end of the world we’ve been living. Our sense of protection and security is stripped away. We are left vulnerable, exposed and wondering how we can possibly go on, how we will support ourselves. Who will be there for us in our darkest hours?
At first it seems as if no one is there. It feels as if we’ve been abandoned, at least it did for me. The spirit of God is always with us, sometimes our pain is simply so deep we can’t even comprehend that we have support. I certainly couldn’t. My perception has deepened and today I realize in my darkest pain I was supported and you will be too. It may not be evident at all times but in small moments, in calm silence it will show its self and I pray you will realize you are supported.
Life
Big Island of Hawaii Photo Credit: Lisa Overman
Shifts happen whether we’re aware of them or not. Shifts can happen when we feel loved, when we feel supported and when we understand that we have no need for our old habits or insecurities. Shifts can change our lives; they open our minds to new ways of living and new ways of doing things. Some shifts happen gradually because spirit knows that’s all we can handle, that too much transition is difficult for many people.
In my own life I have had dramatic shifts and gradual shifts. Sometimes the shift was self inspired, ie a move to a completely different culture and country. Nothing shifts your life than faster than getting on a plane and living full throttle in a culture you don’t understand, where they speak a language you can barely comprehend. Moves like that shift your perceptions and life dramatically in both good and bad ways. Through years of living overseas, in situations where I had to adapt I now feel comfortable traveling most places and am willing to embrace cultures and overseas experiences with ease.
Every shift is different and they are not all warm and fuzzy or comfortable. Sometimes a shift takes us far out of our comfort zone and we have to learn to adapt to a new way of thinking. That process of learning to think differently is the shift taking place. When we become at ease and we see our life expanded we realize the shift has occured and it’s usually an exciting time with opportunities and new experiences.
Spirit is always guiding our life, whether we are willing to realize it or not. Some days we fight it, and other days we flow with it. The shifts are a natural progression of our life and knowledge expanding. As we follow spirit and listen to our internal voice of inspiration and love we can make some dramatic shifts and find our life going in some amazing and exciting directions. The secret is letting go and releasing the need to have all the answers. The shift will happen, spirit will guide it, answers will come just as we least expect it.
Help Quinn Talk
My friend Reba Jean, Ying Yang Spirit has an autistic grandson and they are embarking on a healing experiment with Quinn where they are asking for healing prayers and Reiki for Quinn. For more information and to participate in the Help Quinn Talk, check out their website. Reba is a wonderful Reiki healer and I am so touched by this healing endeavor.
The Emotions of The Holidays
I think most of us can relate to the idea that holidays are filled with moments of deep love, challenge, emotion and a wide variety of expectations. For me it starts with the commercials filled with happy families gathering around to share a meal, opening gifts or sharing their day together. That is the beautiful side of family and committed relationships. The flip side is that most of us have experienced the loss of people that we truly love and treasure and enjoying the holidays without them is never an easy experience. We learn to accept our loss, to move forward, to heal; but somewhere in side, at least for me is a place of sadness that I can no longer share the significance of special days with my parents and with others I’ve lost.
Holidays seem to be filled with a mixture of joy for those we can be with, pleasure for the special moments when we can hold those dear to us and filled with tinges of sadness for what can never be again with those we’ve lost. Even with those we love still near to us on the earth plane the holidays can be a roller coaster of emotion. Families squabble, they have different views on life and they certainly have different priorities and wishes. Talk to anyone in my extended family and you will get a variety of versions of what a holiday should be. Some prefer the holiday with their immediate family, others enjoy the extended family. Some prefer a sit down meal, others enjoy a pot luck so based on my own family I can only imagine that there is an abundance of roller coaster experiences out there for many during the holidays. When I turned on the Today Show this morning, they were discussing strategies to use to handle relatives and emotional situations during the holidays.
For me it’s best to keep it simple by spending time with those I treasure as well as making sure there is private time for reflection and prayer to remember those I miss, who remain close in my heart. Loss and grief are never easy to handle and the added pressure of holiday expections adds another dimension to the pain. My suggestion, detatch from any family drama, focus only on those things that bring you joy and release the expectation of being able to do it all.
|relationship|
|writing on life|
The Law of Dharma
Renaissance Island
Renaissanace Island Aruba
“There are three components to the Law Of Dharma. The first component says that each of us is here to discover our true Self, to find out on our own that our true Self is spiritual, that essentially we are spiritual beings that have taken manifestation in physical form. We are not human beings having occasional spiritual experiences – it’s the other way around: we’re spiritual beings that have occasional human experiences.”
From the book “The Seven Spiritual Law’s of Success” Deepak Chopra
A Travel Dream Becomes Reality
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Flamingo Beach
If you’ve been following my posts of late you know I’m doing exercises and activities from “Ask and It’s Given” By Esther and Jerry Hicks and Abraham. This past week I saw one of my visualization box wishes become reality. To help you understand lets go back about six weeks. Six weeks ago I was following the press trip of a writer I’ve come to enjoy. Her website is Almostfearless.com She gave up her corporate life and became a travel nomad writing and blogging her way around the world with her husband and dogs in tow. I receive her travel updates via email and in early November she was headed out for a six day press trip to write about Belieze, courtesy of Belieze Tourism.
When I saw her post about the trip I said aloud, ” I want to do that. I want to take a press trip like that.” Along with my statement were physical pictures and travel brochures of places in the caribbean I would like to visit. All of this was inside my visualization box which I see daily on my living room stand. Let me also be clear, I’ve spent the last two years blogging for a travel website and have spent ten years of my life traveling and working overseas. So it wasn’t just a whim that had me saying I want to take a press trip. I’ve done the ground work. I have the skills and I have the knowledge to write and travel alone. I was simply asking the universe to help me manifest an opportunity to put my skills in the forefront as a traveler and writer.
Just over one month later I was contacted by the writer whose travel website I write for. She offered me an opportunity to travel as part of a press trip to the caribbean. After thinking 10.5 seconds I said I’m 98% sure I can go, I will get back to you in the morning with a final answer. Of course that answer was YES! Are you kidding me? No writer who loves to travel is going to say no to an opportunity to travel and write about their experience. So within six weeks of my desire to manifest a press trip I was preparing to head out on my own caribbean press trip. Life is pretty amazing!
I departed on Dec 16th for four amazing, adventurous days on the caribbean island of Aruba. I know it was a combination of belief, manifestation, divine support, years of writing, blogging and traveling that created this amazing opportunity. It was powerful and awe inspiring to see this moment manifest in my life. It is the realization of one dream and a start to a whole series of dreams. I am blessed, I am grateful and I am thrilled to be at this place in my life. It feels like a beautiful, spiritual gift. I see these exercises working in my life. I hope you will be inspired to use them in your own life. Namaste
If you would like to follow my posts from Aruba you can find them @ wanderlustandlipstick.com/hammmockinparadise
My Journey of Creating a Dream
My journey, the journey of becoming a writer, speaker and healer of hearts began with my own losses, my own grief and my desire to do something beautiful with the experiences I’ve lived through. This video details what I’m trying to accomplish and asks for the support and help of each of you to share my story and video with those in your life.
My video, The Creation of a Dream.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0v0NnH3jPY0
Namaste,
Lisa
The Realization of My Life’s Work
Today held an epifany moment for me. As I walked through my kitchen, sorting bills and preparing to pay them I paused by the refrigerator, covered in photos. My eye caught the magazine picture I had placed there long ago when I moved in. I’ve been in possesion of the magazine picture for approximately eight years or more. The picture is the scene of a woman writing on a computer on her deck, overlooking the water, a dog close by her side. When I cut that magazine picture out it was with the intention of “creating this life environment for myself”, working at home as a writer with a water view and a dog I loved. As my eye caught that magazine picture this morning, something within me shifted. It was an Ah ha moment.
Spirit was speaking through that magazine picture, showing me I have created this very place for myself. I live in a home overlooking a canal. I’ve created a website geared toward healing, and I’ve completed my book, now awaiting a publisher. For the last year I’ve owned a dog that looks almost completely like the dog from the magazine. When spirit speaks I listen. I know clearly my path is destined to be that of a writer and healer. My work is unfolding and I’m joyous and grateful. Trust in the power of spirit to help you create your dreams and know you will be lead exactly where you belong in divine timing.
Namaste
